Trust is vital in any relationship. True friendship only functions on the basis of trust. The whole principle behind friendship is that we both must groom ourselves until we come to the place where we will not hurt one another; the place where we can be both trusted and trusting.

Trust Does At Least 5 Things for Us

1. Trust is the basis of relationships, and therefore of love and commitment. “The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her.” (Prov 31:11) Without trust our lives will be relationally shallow.
2. Trust lends internal confidence. “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” (Rom 8:28) I can be bold when I know and trust that God is in control of my life and future.
3. Trust produces godly motivation. “Who among you fears the Lord? Who obeys the voice of His servant? Who walks in darkness and has no light? Let him trust in the Name of the Lord and rely upon his God.” (Isa 50:10) I don’t hesitate to follow where He leads me.
4. Trust develops maturity and transformation in our lives. It allows God to work in me.
5. Trust generates joy and peace. Phil 4:4 ‘I don’t understand, but I do trust you.’

How the Bridge of Trust is Broken

1. Breaking Promises: “Let your “Yes” be “Yes,” and your “No” be “No,” lest you fall into judgment.” (Jam 5:12)
2. Manipulation: through guilt, fear, intimidation, flattery, or anger. This causes people to feel controlled and used. Then they become resentful and distrustful. “O foolish Galatians who bewitched you that you should not obey the truth.” (Gal 3:1)
3. Role-playing: lack of transparency, two-faced, not being real, not open or honest.
4. Gossip: “A perverse man sows strife, and a whisperer separates the best of friends.” (Prov16:28)
5. Win-lose thinking: You can win the argument but lose a friend. Always aim for win-win, whenever possible.

5 Things That Will Help in Building Trust

1. You must see how important trust is. Our attitude should be: “I really do want to trust you and, until proven otherwise, I will.” Instead of, “I won’t trust you until you prove trustworthy.” Distrust breeds distrust. Trust breeds the life and character of Jesus.
2. If possible, never do anything that would injure trust. Don’t do anything that would destroy a person’s trust in you or your trust in them. If a bridge is destroyed it is difficult to rebuild it the second or third time. The absence of trust is suspicion and the effect is isolation – to be totally alone.
3. Realize that “trials test trust.” Let trust be your strength in difficult times rather than cast away your confidence which has great reward. (Ps 112:7) “He will not be afraid of evil tidings; His heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord.”
4. Recognize when you have a lack of trust. Find out why. Identify the problem. Is it something in me or is it something in the other person? In identifying it, we can treat it until we find ourselves back in confidence mode.
5. In order to be trusted, we have to be trustworthy. “He who swears to his own hurt and does not change.” (Psalm 15:4) We must be men and women of our word. When we make commitments, we must stick to them.

Yours for developing and maintaining true friendships and working relationships,

Dr. George Hill,
Founder and President of Victory Churches International
www.victoryint.org